22 May 2006

ambition

We sat around the dinner table. Celebrating. It was a wonderful evening.

She leaned over and chuckled sardonically, "So, are you still going to medical school?"

"No," I responded without explanation, "Why?"

"Because some people have ambition," she said with a patronizing grin.

Silence.

I'm not sure why I didn't say anything. I didn't defend myself. I just returned to my meal and my thoughts for the remainder of the evening.

A few days later, I am still fuming.

Does the fact that I chose to put my professional aspirations up on a shelf mean that I lack ambition? Does the fact that these aspirations have changed as I have struggled through my difficult questions and realized my priorities mean that I lack ambition? Does the fact that my days often consist of poopy diapers, naps, laundry, constant cleaning and perpetual frustrations with a toddler mean that I lack ambition? Does the fact that I have chosen to be around for my children’s milestones as their primary caregiver during the most formative years of their lives mean that I lack ambition? Does the fact that I wrestle almost daily with the humility required of "just being a mom
" mean that I lack ambition? Does the fact that I am walking in obedience to what I believe the Lord has called me to today mean that I lack ambition????

With all due respect, I think not.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's interesting what people define as "ambitious" these days. I mean what a bunch of unmotivated slobs we are...mothers, coaches, aspiring actors/writers...guess we'd be better off as doctors, businessmen, and lawyers...but somehow I doubt it. fyl

Katy Yates said...

isn't it amazing how our parent's words can cut straight to our hearts and leave a blazing trail of pain? does it ever scare you that you might do the same to your child?

i've decided that if i ever write a book someday it will be titled "so what do you do all day?"....demystifiying the role of the stay at home mom.

it takes courage, strength, boldness, wit, wisdom, patience, humor, energy and above all AMBITION to teach an infant about the world and raise a child to learn how to be a part of that world. i don't know any other career as demanding or challenging...or rewarding.

be confident that you are exactly where God wants you and that He has enabled you with great ambition to fulfill His plan for you!

Leah said...

abi = ambition for all the right reasons!

so you better step off

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